Tuesday, February 26, 2013

When it rains it pours...

Today was a very long day. After water therapy I had a drs appointment. Liam could have stayed with his uncle
But he chose to come because the ladies always let him swim. My appointment was at one o'clock. I walked out of the office at 10 after 3. Without going into boring details a simple appointment for paperwork turned into a fiasco. As always that requires bloodwork because the girl with 15 tattoos and who is a "retired" tattoo artist, is of course afraid of needles. When I came out Liam was half asleep. I quickly filled my hubs in on what had went on. I left out many details in case Bugga was listening.
We went about our errands. Liam was still super quiet. He was rosy cheeked and just out of sorts. I kept asking him if was okay and all he would say is yes. This went on all day!!!! He fell asleep waiting for dinner to get done. Rare but hey, we had a busy stressful day. He ate about 5 kernels of corn. That isn't out of the ordinary. We all know how our kids are when it comes to eating.
His friend "A" came over. He just sat there. He watched his movie and fell asleep twice. I felt him, no fever. So when his friend went home I sat him down to talk.
He refused to say anything for awhile. After asking him 101 questions we finally got it out of him. He thinks momma is dying.
We told him I'm not but in the back of my head I was telling God he better not make a liar out of me because none of us know when our time will come. I can't explain that to Liam. He worries too much. Liam has to be told we all live to be super super old and then we get to go play with God. I don't like lying to my son (except for santa, easter bunny etc) but I have to make this exception because his anxiety is so bad! It's the only way he can get past it.
The night moves on and he still isn't the same. He won't play with me or talk to me. He even turned down video games! I know something is wrong!!! This isn't my child. I brought out donut holes, that was a no go. No Oreos,no chips, no junk!?!?! This is sooooo not my baby! I did get him to eat an ice pop and when I reached up to kiss his head he was burning up. Took his temp 102.9
This poor child no sooner gets over one illness and he's onto the next. I give him multivitamins everyday. He drinks pedia sure everyday and loves fruit. I don't understand why he is always getting sick???
So I guess my point here is that the day I thought was horrible seemed to get worse.... It never fails! Here's hoping for a better tomorrow. Oh and btw, it's not raining or pouring but the sleet and ice is pounding down on the roof....

Autistic People Should be.......

  So I first took notice to this awful search when Kerry Magro posted about it on facebook over the weekend. He stated that when you searched "Autistics should" in facebook, the first search that came up was "DIE"!!!! It angered me to no extent, but I really didn't have the heart or energy to try looking into myself. I was heading into a fibro flare up and anyone with fibro knows how horrible that is. I am not looking for a pity party, so I won't bore you the details. Just know I was tired, in pain, and miserable. :)

  Yesterday morning when I awoke and head to my my computer, foggy eyed and coffee in hand I saw a post by fellow (but much better) Autism blogger and daddy Jim W. His post for the morning was exactly about what Kerry was talking about. The abomination that shows up when you search Google for "Autistics Should be..." Jim even had pics of this horrible search. For his blog and a looky loo at the pic, click here.

  Needless to say that put a huge damper in an already sucky Monday morning. I had to search this for myself. Not that I didn't believe the two men I look up too (literally bc I am really short ;) ) but because I had to see the atrocity for myself. Seeing is believing. So I did..... (Blogger is still not letting me add pics to my blog, annoying as hell!!!!) So if you want to see for yourself, click here, or try searching "Autistics Should be" on Google.

  Okay, I really am trying to get to a point here!!!! This needs to be changed. If you were the parent of a newly diagnosed child, and you went to google for info, and you searched that, and saw what it says, what would you be thinking? I think I would be scared, sad, angry, and probably worried. So this must changed. We must work together and write about what Autistic People Should be, so when it is searched, the positive shows up.

  Bloggers already took to this. The author of the blog Yes, That Too, rallied other autism bloggers to join her and do just that. Now, I am always a day late and a dollar short, so I am just now jumping on this awesome bandwagon. If you would like to check out what the other bloggers wrote, click here.

  Now onto my part. I want someone who searches that to see things like, Autistic People Should Be: considered experts on Autism. They should be respected. They should be heard. They should be encouraged to be themselves. They should be accepted for who they are. They should be loved. They should be praised. I am sure there are many more things I could think of, but of course Liam is now up, and his motor mouth is non stop, and we need to get on to his morning routine.....

  Please, if this bothers you as much as it did me, and the many others, consider speaking out. Consider blogging with the title Autistic People Should Be, so we can change that search.....

Monday, February 25, 2013

Bowling vs Burger King


So, yesterday was the big day! Our local Autism support group was meeting to take our kiddos bowling. The reservations were made, the kiddos were stoked. Liam has never been bowling and I was so excited for another "first" with him!!!  My family was the first to arrive, and when we walked in, I was nervous. The place was CRAWLING with other kiddos, and LOUD. Didn't matter, we could do this. Liam was so excited, and even brought his friend "A" to have fun.
  I get to the counter and a little old man asks if I am here for the party or with the "teachers." I smile, reply no and tell him I am there with the PASKA Autism group. He looks nervous. "Ummm, let me check that,"  he replies." He mumbles it to his wife. She shakes her head no, and says, "No not til March!" SAY WHAT???? I tell her no, my hubby called to reserve back in JANUARY (the date was 2/23 at 1 pm)! Then, our founder called back to double check and make the final reservation. (at which time the time was changed from 1 until 230) Now the old lady gets a bit cocky, brings over her reservation book and says, (pointing her arthritic finger in her damn book), "It's right here, not until March 24th!!!!!" (Okay, I know this was reserved. I know I am NOT losing it.) I raise my voice. My hubby senses this and cuts me off to save face, and intervenes. He then goes on to say it was HE who originally called, and he knows when the date was, it was SUPPOSED to be today. Now I heard the reservation being made, we ALL did. Instead of admitting that she wrote it on the wrong month, she goes on to say no reservation was made, no final call was placed. REALLY??? Then how the hell do you have us reserved in March if "No reservation was made." I walked out. I walked out because I wanted to slap her. I walked out because I didn't want to go to jail for assaulting an old batty woman. I walked out and tried to smile. I called our founder and she was appalled. She of course made the second call to double check the reservation. She of course knew today was the day, and she of course was just as pissed as we were!
  At this time, another family from PASKA arrived, and we told her what happened. Then hubs had an idea! (shocker! JK) We left and headed to Burger King. BK has an indoor play place. At least this way the kids could have some fun and not be disappointed! In the mean time, I contacted the other 2 families that I knew were coming, and they too joined us all at BK. The kids were happy. We were happy (now that we vented about it and moved on.)
  So all in all it was a good day. Am I still pissed?? Sure am!!!! This woman didn't even try to make it right for our kids. She didn't offer another time or date. She DIDN'T CARE. Plain and simple. I will make sure I tell everyone I know that STARLITE BOWLING LANES, in TOWANDA PA SUCKS!!!! They are RUDE, INCOMPETENT, and don't care about SPECIAL NEEDS KIDS!!!!! I made sure to leave a poor review on their business page as well......

Friday, February 22, 2013

Which parent are YOU???

  As of late I have been noticing a "pattern" in the parents that surround me. Whether these parents have children with Autism, "NT" children, or both, the pattern remains. I am finally sitting down to collect my thoughts on this, so bear with me......
  So basically I have been noticing 3 kinds of parents. The "Whoa is Me Parent," the "My Kid is Better Than Your Kid Parent," and the "Happy Medium Parent." What are these types of parents you ask?? Well, let's break it down.

   The My Kid is Better Than Your Kid Parent: This is the parent that is ALWAYS comparing their child to others. No matter what it may be, your child is always standing in their child's shadow. (At least in the eyes of this parent.) You know this parent. "(Insert Child's name) is so smart! (Insert child's name) only spends x amount of time in the ASD class! You know, (insert YOUR child's name) would have to spend so much more time in the ASD class.  (Insert their child's name) has such "mild" autism, I am so lucky" This could go on for ever because this parent never ceases to make you feel like you and your child are less than them and their child. It's like a viscous cycle!!!

  The Whoa is Me Parent: This is the parent that no matter what may be happening in your life, they have it SO much worse. You know this parent too. Let me set an example.... You say, "Oh I am so tired because (your kiddo's name) didn't sleep well last night." At which time the WiMP says, (most likely with an eye roll, or a miserable look on their face), "Well, I haven't slept in x amount of days because (insert their child's name) hasn't slept in x amount of days!!!" (Feel free to insert some ridiculous number there because this parent almost always dramatically exaggerates the situation, no matter what it may be!) Or maybe you are tired because your kiddo had a rough meltdown day. Maybe you need to vent about this, and of course the parent that you're venting too is the WiMP . You might say, "Ugh! "Johnny" had such a rough day yesterday!!! He had x amount of meltdowns and I am physically and mentally exhausted!" Now, you know the WiMP  is now going to go on about how many MORE meltdowns their child had and how much WORSE it was......

  Now, the Happy Medium Parent: This is where I feel I fit in. I am in the happy medium. I try to surround myself with other HMP's, but that isn't always the way it goes. We all know the MKiBTYK and WiMP are often unavoidable....I digress. HMP's are happy with every day. They have good days, they have bad days, as do their kiddos. BUT, they are thankful for EVERY DAY with their LO's. The HMP knows their life isn't perfect, but also knows some have it much worse. The HMP's are the ones with level heads, and the ones that are always there for everyone else. They are grateful for the life they have. They don't waste time comparing their kiddos to others. They don't waste time making their life seem so hard, and exaggerating every bad day of their life. The HMP's have bad days too. BUT instead of hiding it, or instead of making a big deal about it, they get up, they dust themselves off, and they move on. Regardless of how much or how little sleep they have, regardless of the size of their kiddo's meltdown, regardless of the amount of time their kiddo spends in an ASD class as compared to an inclusive class....regardless of all this, these parents, keep fighting the good fight. They keep living the good life.....and do you know why???? Because they don't concern themselves with being better than someone else.  They don't concern themselves with being worse than another.  They just BE. They live, they love, and they help those that they can. The Happy Medium Parents make the best friends! <3

  Soooo, which parent are you??? Do you know some of these other parents???

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Happy V Day....

  Happy Valentines Day. For some this day is uber romantic, and looked forward to. For others it's a bitter reminder of the romance they are avidly searching for. For me.....it's just day in which I try harder than ever to show Liam how much I love him.
  As an autie parent you know how showing love is on our children's terms, and I'm okay with that for the most part. He knows I love him. I tell him all the time, and he tells me. (though I have come to realize he is merely echoing what I say to him. Getting an "I love you" from Liam without a prompt is few and far between. So when that happens, it means the world) 
  Last night I baked him special cupcakes. He didn't care. This morning I surprised him with a reese heart. His response, "Did Sandy (sandman) bring that to me???" I told him no, and asked what he meant. "Well, I was hoping the Guardians brought that to me." I told him no, it was from me because I love him. "Oh...." That's it, that's what I got. I am ok with that. As much as I would have liked a huge hug and a kiss, I know he loves me in his own Liam way. And he always shows it in his own Liam way. 
  As annoying as it is not being able to pee alone, take a shower with him having to be on the other side of the door talking my ear off, sneaking into my bed at night,  and so on....as annoying as that may be at times, it's Liam's way of loving me......and I love him for it.
  As for hubs. All he asked for was no bake cookies. Momma makes banging no bake cookies!! What did I get you ask.....Flowers, no. They are gorgeous but they die. To a family with VERY limited income, to me, it's a waste of money. Chocolate, no. There is a never ending supply of that in our home. A card where he professes his undying love for me....well one can only hope.....and if not, Paddy you will be on the poop list!!!! In all seriousness though he got me something I have been asking for. He got him an electronic cigarette. 
  I really want to quit smoking and I would probably kill someone if I tried to quit cold turkey. My momma has had great success using hers, so now it's my turn. So far so good. I got it yesterday and have only smoked 2 real cigs. I am hoping to be done with real cigs all together by next week. Yes, to the neigh sayers, I will still be "smoking." BUT, all I am inhaling is vapor and nicotine. No harmful additives, no tar. And the price, about 15$ for what would be a carton of cigs.....can't beat that!!! No the real test will be if it works after Liam has a meltdown. When he has a rough day, I smoke more. So if this staves of the need to smoke a real cig on a bad day, then it's worth the 16$ bucks and then some. Wish me luck!!!
  I hope you all have a great V day with your LO's.....I hope your autie kiddo shows you some love, even if it's just following you to the bathroom to tell you about his/her current obsession. I hope you feel loved today, and every day <3

Friday, February 8, 2013

Freebie Friday Review

 So if you follow my ALFL page then you know that last week I started Freebie Friday. Well of course, who doesn't like freebies! As Hubs says, "if it's free it's for me!" Well as I am learning that is NOT always the case. So I decided that along with linking freebies to you all, I would download the ones I could, then Liam and I would try them out to give you a review. Pretty cool right?!?!?!?

  Okay so here goes:

First up: Hungry Hungry Hippos (I mean who didn't love this game as a kid???? As an adult, it's too damn loud!!!) So I thought, ooohhh app will be quieter. (this app is for iPhone and iPad) I downloaded it, and Liam and I both tried it. The results:

Liam gave it ONE thumb up.....(I have a pic, but blogger is being a jerk!) So anyway, he only gave it ONE because, "it's good for little kids, but not big kids like me!" So there you have it.

Momma gave it ONE thumb as well. It was kind of hard to manipulate, but the graphics were cute!

To see for yourself, you can get it here: Hungry Hungry Hippo

Next on the list is Lego Creationary. This app is also for iPhone and iPad. I downloaded it, and we gave it a try. The results......

Liam gave it ONE thumb up....mainly because he was in too much of a hurry to actually try it out. I will try to get him to check it out again later.

Momma gave it TWO thumbs up! I liked it. I thought it was easy to play, and a good brain game. The gist, you roll a dice, it tells you house, tool, etc. Then it gives you four pics and it builds something. Your job is to guess what it's building based on the four pics before it's done. Pretty cool I think!

To check this out for yourself, you can get it here: Lego Creationary

The other freebie I shared, I can't rate because Liam doesn't have a leap pad. I hope it's good, and your kiddos enjoy it <3